Babadook Destroys Trump on Wiretap Issue

The Internet РAs this publication reported previously, Donald Trump recently tried to goad the Babadook into tweeting at him again, and now he got his wish. But he may  end up regretting it, if he is capable of regret at all.

The Babadook started with this tweet:

Harsh words from a harsh monster. You might think that the Babadook’s words couldn’t get any scarier, but then it said this:

Terrifying and true. Whether you are the president, or just some random person who is not the president, the statements you make can haunt you for as long as you are alive. Or longer if there is an afterlife. Also, considering Donald Trump’s propensity for manic tweets, it is hard to believe he will stop tweeting for the rest of his life unless the rest of his life is not very long. So this could be construed as a threat and earn the Babadook a top spot on a watch list, although having to keep tabs on the Babadook in person is not an enviable task.

It is much easier, and safer, to keep tabs on the Babadook’s Twitter presence, which also includes this tweet:

Mega-ouch. The Babadook could not have been more brutal to Donald Trump unless it started haunting him in person.

Maybe the in-person haunting is happening, and that’s why 45’s behavior has been particularly erratic today.

Obama Hacked Trump’s Twitter To Make President Seem Paranoid

The Internet – Donald Trump’s Twitter account posted a series of tweets this morning accusing Barack Obama of illegally wiretapping Trump Tower, which many are saying makes Mr. Trump look even crazier than usual. However, according to words on the internet, the president didn’t write or even dictate those tweets. What really happened is Mr. Obama hacked into the @realDonaldTrump Twitter account to make Donald Trump look bad.

According to these same anonymous but totally real sources, this isn’t the first time Obama hacked Trump’s Twitter. Every time a particularly ludicrous tweet has been released this year, it wasn’t Trump behind the words. It was Obama. The current president has been reluctant to admit that his Twitter had been compromised, since being vulnerable to such interference might make Donald Trump seem weak, but the hacks happened. Mr. Trump has even adopted some of the lunatic talking points in his public statements to keep people from suspecting he’d been Twitter-hacked, but he has been. By Barack Obama.

Some may find it preposterous that Obama would spend his post-presidency hacking the current president’s Twitter account, citing reports that Mr. Obama ¬†spent the end of January on vacation, but Barack Obama didn’t take a vacation. As all people visiting certain corners of the internet are well aware, Obama spent almost his entire presidency on vacation and is therefore all vacationed out. Any more vacations and he would literally explode from happiness, so he sent Barack Clonebama instead. And as Barack Obama’s totally real clone soaked up the sun with Richard Branson, the former president sat in his lair with a bunch of evil computer programmers and plotted to make Donald Trump look as ridiculous as possible.

Because Donald Trump doesn’t do enough to embarrass himself on his own.